dachsbuns | [Closed] @eidxiety ††

Oh, I'm not trying to be rude! I just... [He's from a very conservative family.] ...I've never been to one of these places, and all I've heard are negative things.

I want to go in. You brought me here, after all.

[The audience "awws" and stuff. Ain's going in, though, he's just... y'know, he's following in Wolfwood's footsteps. You go first. He's right behind you.]

[Don't worry Ain, he'll protect you from the sin. Probably.]

It'll be fine. Trust me.

[Do you trust him, Ain? Because he's walking inside now, pushing open the door to the tune of the bartender calling out his name in greeting. Does Wolfwood come here often...?

Usually he'd plant his ass up at the bar, but since Ain is clearly uncomfortable, he'll sit at one of the tables on the floor instead. Inside, the bar is...not inactive by a long shot, but certainly not as bustling as it would be tonight. There are a few people already stationed at the bar, some others eating at the tables...there's a juke box here as well, alongside a big pool table where some people are already playing, the sound of the balls being split echoing through the place. Other than it being lit a bit darker than Ain is probably used to, it is...surprisingly normal.

A waitress comes by, and Wolfwood orders himself a glass of brandy- yes he is day drinking- while the lady asks Ain if he'll be having anything from their drinks menu, which she points out to him where it's sitting on the table.]

[You know when you go to a new place for the first time and you get culture shock? That's Ain right now. Wolfwood being known here is a comfort in some way, at least, but Ain's not sure how to hold himself. At least he isn't dressed super wealthy tonight; anyone could own a plain sweater like this one, and it's not like his cardigan last time that was very clearly both a nerd thing and made of cashmere. He blends in, at least, but he also looks like some loser who's never gone drinking before.

Probably because he is that loser, and he nods and glances at the menu, and he's not sure what to order, so—]

Oh, I'm not super familiar... something sweet?

["A margarita?" she asks, and Ain nods. It is a girly drink, but who's going to judge him for that? The alcohol content in those is through the roof, if he wants to get sloshed on something that won't burn his throat who cares.

This is probably not a good thing to have on your first drinking experience. Ain's had sips of wine from communion before, yeah, but that really doesn't count. Communion wine is not a party drink.

When she's gone, Ain does that anxious thing he does where he starts pulling at the ends of his sleeves.]

It seems very... normal.

[Ain, honey, what do you think goes on at most bars.]

[...Ain. Honey.]

You sure you wanted that? [Wolfwood asks as the waitress leaves, leaving the two of them to chat while they wait for their drinks.] You don't gotta drink just because I am. They've got non-alcoholic stuff too.

[He doesn't even ask. He knows just by the way he's acting that he's never drank, period.]

Yeah...? She said it was sweet! I know there are a lot of bitter liquors out there, and I'm sure I won't like those.

[...]

I'll be fine! There's a first time for everything, right?

[More lies he's going to tell his mom later: No that's not alcohol on his breath, no he didn't ride on a motorcycle today, no he wasn't at the southside again, no he did not have sinful dreams about a man.]

Well…only if you’re sure. I don’t wanna pressure you.

[Wolfwood won’t press him if that’s what he really wants. He’s right, there IS a first time for everything, and even a single drink shouldn’t be too much for a lightweight.

Unlike their food from the diner, the drinks come out fast. Wolfwood’s is practically straight liquor, whereas Ain’s is fruity and colorful and came with a little umbrella. Wolfwood immediately grabs his for a swig, thank you he needs this you can’t catch him gay thoughts etc.]

It might be a little strong at first. But the fruity drinks generally ain’t so bad.

[Well, compared to brandy, which is a 35-60% alcohol content, but margaritas go from 18-25%, so it might be a little much for Ain's first time having a real drink that's not a sip of wine. They Do Not Drink at his house. Momma was a prohibition supporter. She can't control the flow of liquor through her hoity-toity rich area because rich people love their 100 years aged liquors, but Ain was not raised with the belief of indulgences. Indulgences are sin. Et cetera.

He takes a drink. It's good, and he makes a face like he's surprised that it's good as he licks the sugar off the rim of the glass like a fucking animal. He takes another drink. And then another. It's like drinking juice.

Ain is going to be a little more than tipsy by the end of this.]

It's good! Haha, yours probably burns going down, right?

[Wolfwood is an experienced drinker. The burn as it goes down is familiar, yet even he can’t help but cough into his elbow afterward, shuddering visibly.]

It’ll put some hair on your chest, that’s for sure. It’s nice to have when it’s cold out like this. Warms you up.

[Ain might start to notice that with his drink too, the deeper in he gets. Not the burn, but the warmth it seems to fill him with.]

I figured you might be too full to eat- [lol] -but you’re welcome to order something if you want. They don’t have much by way of full meals here, though…it’s mostly appetizers.

Edited 2024-02-10 01:02 (UTC)

[lol

Ain does start to feel very warm after a bit. It's nice... unfortunately Tipsy Ain has minimal filter, so:]

Mmm, yeah, I don't have any hair on my chest. And I think you have enough, don't you?

[lmao lmao lmao—]

I might order something. [...] Do you have any recommendations? I'm a little out of my element.

[A LITTLE?]

Recs, huh…

[HMMMM]

You ever had nachos?

...you're going to laugh at me again. [So that's a no.] But I know what they are!

[Yes, Ain, you knew what the other things were, too, you just didn't have them before then. Sigh.

Either way... nachos. It sounds like he's going to try that for the first time, too, and so he flags down the waitress and places an order, and then he goes back to his drink. He's about halfway through it already. It's only a matter of time before he starts running his mouth. At least the food will help.]

I think you’ll like ‘em. The ones they sell here come loaded too, so it ain’t just chips and cheese.

[Chips, cheese, meat, tomato, guac…it may very well be a full meal in itself to some people. Maybe not Ain, though.

Wolfwood sort of raises a brow as they sit, a little surprised by how much drink he’s already downed. Yeah boy’s gonna be tipsy for sure going that fast.]

…hey, uh. Thanks for comin’ out to see me again. I know this place isn’t what you’re used to, but…you’re pretty fun to hang around.

Aww, you don't have to thank me. I wanted to see you again. Besides, I stole your jacket for a week — I had to give it back to you.

[That was just an excuse, though. Ain wanted to see Wolfwood again, and now here he is, seeing Wolfwood again. He wouldn't have made off with the jacket either way, but still.]

You're my first friend. It really wasn't going to be difficult to convince me to come out here. Besides, I... you're showing me a lot of things I never get to experience. I came to the market two weeks ago for a change of pace, and now I'm having more fun than I think I've ever had before. Thanks for... uh, putting up with me, I guess.

First friend, huh? Prolly could have done a bit better.

[He jokes, laughing softly under his breath. He doesn’t really mean it, though. If anything, he’s…flattered, really.]

You’re more different than anyone I’ve ever known. But that ain’t necessarily a bad thing.

[Ain is cute as fuck too but he’s trying not to dwell on THAT too much-]

You’re real sweet. Those types are a dime a dozen these days.

[Don't think about the freckles, Wolfwood. Don't think about the glimpse of skin you got and don't think about his ass pressed to your crotch for multiple bike rides. Absolutely never consider these things.

The food arrives, and Ain gleefully thanks the waitress and looks at this towering mass of chips and slop, trying to decide where to start.]

Am I sweet? Haha, I could say the same about you. Mm... and protective. Someone's gonna get real lucky some day.

[He takes another drink, then finally turns his attention to the nachos. He'll be a few chips in when he speaks up again.]

A flutter bum like you spending time with an average-looking private school nerd like me sounds like something straight out of a comic book. Strange match, huh?

[whoops calls Wolfwood hot to his face, oops—]

[Haha…Wolfwood’s BEEN thinking about those things. It is too late for him, unfortunately. In fact, the whole time they’ve been here he’s been sort of staring at Ain, wondering if he’ll be able to catch another slip of skin. He’s wearing clothing that’s very pointedly covering his legs and arms as much as humanely possible to the point where he’s shocked he isn’t wearing a scarf or a turtle neck or something.

Someone. Yeah, right.]

Did you put cotton in your ears when we met?

[He huffs, picking up a chip that’s already dripping with cheese, gesturing at Ain with it.]

You’re not average-looking in the slightest. …you’re cute.

[Someone slumped over the bar lifts their head and starts rubbernecking like wtf did one of Chapel’s boys just say-

He’s quick to backpedal a little after that, though. Best not to lay it on too thick, even if his crush has pretty much cemented itself by this point.]

Just. Y’know. Quit sellin’ yourself short.

[Like that first time Wolfwood said he was cute, Ain's cheeks flare pink, an ostensibly cute habit, and he kicks the toe of Wolfwood's shoe with his own under the table.]

I'm manly as hell. [No, no you are not.] I see what you're doing, though.

[...]

You're trying to get on my good side so you can eat all my nachos! [Maybe the rubbernecker will stop when he realises that these two are stupid. Or maybe he won't, because these two are clearly on a date (Ain still doesn't know this). Also, the plate of nachos is big enough for the two to share. Nachos are a sharing food.] You're lucky I'm feeling extra generous, or I'd eat them all and not let you have any.

[He's teasing. If it's not obvious by the mirth in his eyes, he's absolutely teasing. It is... the only way he can cope with the way Wolfwood is making him feel right now.]

I don’t think you know what that word means.

[Wolfwood snickers, kicking Ain’s shoe in return, albeit lightly. The rubbernecker isn’t staring anymore at least, but they’re definitely listening as the two talk. It’s not as loud in here as it would be at night, so that’s surprisingly easy to do.

Yes, they are incredibly stupid. It makes it hard to tell if they’re just really dumb, or actual flaming homosexuals.]

Plus, if I wanted to eat your nachos, I would’ve eaten ‘em all by now. You’re not the only one with a cast iron stomach!

[Well. Wolfwood’s is more built for alcohol and cigarettes, as opposed to copious amounts of food.]

Surprised you even got room still for all this. We just ate a bunch of froyo.

[Ain will end up eating most of the nachos, let’s be honest with ourselves.]

[Only time will tell if one of Chapel's boys gets outed as a gay™. Ain... definitely looks and acts the part, but he's got that passing obliviousness that bleeds into everything else, therefore masks him with this air of "maybe he's not gay, maybe he's just got a soft face". Ain't his fault he's got soft features.

(He's gay. And a bottom.)]

I told you, I have a black hole for a stomach. You have cotton in your ears, not me.

[Both of these things can be true. As Ain basically shovels the nachos into his face here, the waitress comes by to ask how everything is, because it is law that they must do that when people's mouths are full. Ain gives a thumbs up and covers his mouth with his hand so that he's not chewing in front of her, trying to be polite. She asks if either of them would like another drink. Ain nods, like yes this is a Horrible idea give him another drink puhlease.]

You're taller than I am. And buffer. How do you eat less?

How should I know? Ain’t you the doctor here?

[He specializes in not-so-living people, after all. Ain’s the expert in the living ones.

Wolfwood…does not order a second brandy. He could drink another, but he’d get drunk for sure, and he needs to be able to drive later. So just one is fine, his tolerance is such that he might just be on the edge of tipsy. Now Ain, on the other hand…

Don’t go forgetting these are spiked, babe.]

Looks like them nachos are a hit though, huh?

[He does not need to answer the nacho question because those things are gonna be gone in another two minutes. The only delay is that Wolfwood's first set of questions prompts a hum and a moment where Ain thinks, yeah okay, he's not too sloshed, he can answer this.]

Faster metabolism on my end. My entire family has it. All of us are very skinny. It's probably my dad's fault — he was a real scrawny Korean man.

[The Ishmaels are half-German half-Korean, of which the German side is the only reason Ain is so white-passing.]

You... you look like you work out, but your metabolism must be slower than mine. I walk everywhere most of the time in my neighbourhood, and I only drive when I want to go somewhere that'll take longer than an hour to walk to, so that lends to it.

There. Happy with that explanation, Mr. Priest?

…Well yeah, guess that’ll about do it.

[He has to admit, he wasn’t expecting Ain to whip out an actual explanation like that. Guess he wasn’t lying when he said he was a doctor. The whole thing leaves Wolfwood smiling in spite of himself as he leans back in his chair. He’ll also steal another nacho for good measure before he continues.]

I wouldn’t say I work out though, but yaknow, thanks for noticing.

[is it normal to feel this sheepish after your guy friend calls you buff, asking for a friend.]

What do you mean you don't work out?

[Hey guy rubbernecking at the bar: enjoy this!]

A guy as big as you has to be! You're lying to me!

[Wolfwood would feel even more sheepish if Ain admitted that he's been dreaming of fondling them titties ayyy, anyway guess who's taking a big gulp of his second glass of margarita after those nachos get polished off it's Aiiiin—]

You know, guys can just be big without working out.

[Wolfwood smirks as he says that, as if Ain would know. He’s still watching you chug that drink, please take it slow he is worried about you-

Also yeah, that rubbernecker is listening a lot harder now than they were before, considering.]

Glad to know that I am just naturally jacked. [You know what? Just to tease, he suddenly decides to take off his jacket, revealing that he is only wearing a wife beater underneath. The only reason he does this is so he can flex his right arm playfully for Ain’s benefit.] You see?

[This of course is only half true. Wolfwood gets plenty of exercise running around doing his mafia shit, so of course he would be a little built from all of that. Probably more so in the area of his thighs than anything though, which Ain will have intimate familiarity with by the time Wolfwood gets him back to the bus stop.]

[The face Ain makes in response is not a straight man's reaction, that's for sure. He goes red from his cheeks to the tips of his ears and sips his drink again, practically chugging it while he tries to get his mind anywhere else.

It does not go anywhere else. Wolfwood is being ogled, and suddenly Ain is unconsciously crossing his legs and squirming for reasons he couldn't even begin to parse. Oof.

Masculine jealousy. Y...yeah.]

Y-you are not... naturally... [Ugh. Nevermind. He's too tipsy now. Maybe his face is burning because of all the liquor. This is his first time drinking and he's two glasses and a plate of nachos into the night. It ain't lookin' good for him.] That's not how anything works. That's all.

[Mmmmmmm boy pretty— no. No brain, no no, bad brain go away bad brain be gone with your bad self brain!!!]

Aren't you cold? [cover back up he's having a crisis]

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