dachsbuns | [Closed] @eidxiety ††

It is your fault! And what if I am a tourist! You must not see many of those because this side of town is so messed up! It's too— [Ain flips his wrist around, his grocery bags comically sliding down his arm and into the crook of his elbow as he does so,] —lawless over here for anyone to feel safe!

[Everyone is so very safe with Ishmael, but the problem is if you even Look at someone in a way that could be considered "deviant behaviour", you Will be sent out of town or "mysteriously disappear". The government can't even stop her, and that's mostly due to the fact that she is, admittedly, keeping all the wealthy people safe. God is good, blah blah blah, don't commit adultery or murder or gay or God will smite you.]

[Don't commit gay? Yeah sorry Wolfwood already failed step one.]

It ain't lawless. You just don't know how things work around here.

[His voice dips a bit lower, almost dangerous. He may not have as much love for the system as some seem to, but he does take pride in where he lives and hails from. It's a rough place, he knows that, but there's a certain freedom here that you aren't going to find up north. People can just...be. They can express themselves without fear of being outcast. That sort of thing just couldn't happen on Lady Ishmael's turf, even if he knows that it isn't entirely sunshine and rainbows over here.

It's a Hell of a different breed. And the Eye, being a church of its own, disapproves of people like Wolfwood just as much as Lady Ishmael's does. It's just that Wolfwood keeps that part of himself buried deep. That way, he can't get in trouble.

It's fine.]

Look, I've been tryin' to keep your ass out of hot water ever since you got here. Don't bend over backwards thanking me or nothin'.

[Pouts pouts pouts—]

Have you? I don't think you have! And I won't bend over for you! [Ain????] It was very nice of you to give me money after my wallet got stolen, but a fraction of that would have saved me some trouble. Thank you for the money, and thank you for your assistance, but I'm going back to my car now.

[He's parallel parked up the block, where most people who stop at this market are parked. Ain spins on his heel to walk to his car, gets close to it...

...breaks into a sprint when he sees something wrong and the fucking driver's side window has been smashed open. Someone was clearly rooting around in here for stuff because he has a fucking Ferrari, an expensive one mind, not that they're not normally expensive but it still is not your average man's car. Ain doesn't keep anything important in his car, he's not that dumb, but uh. He was dumb enough to bring the thing out here, so.

...

He just. Sadly opens his back door, puts his groceries in the back seat, walks around to the front passenger's side, looks at the glass in the driver's seat... bonks his head into the top of the car. Screams.

Why.]

[......well. There's your problem.

Look like a rich boy, walk like a rich boy, talk like a rich boy, and bring all your rich boy toys to the poor side of town? Yeah. You're GOING to get robbed, mugged, and your car broken into. This is honestly less that the town itself is bad, and more that Ain's common sense is on the floor, here. And Wolfwood can't even blame him for that much, really...he wouldn't know if he's never been here. Like yes, Wolfwood takes offense to the idea that this town is completely unsafe to live in and is just full of crime all the time. If it were, the Eye wouldn't be here. No, the Eye's existence is what keeps these streets cleaner than they would have been, Wolfwood is confident of that much.

But he thinks Ain wouldn't be too happy to bandy about a moral quandry like that right now, not when his car has been broken into.

He'll wait for him to have his moment (because of course he followed him, who do you take him for) before he approaches with his hands in his pockets. Anyone else might have gloated, and honestly Wolfwood kindof feels like it, but instead...]

Let me take a look. I can tell you if they tried to hotwire it or not, and if you need to take it somewhere to get that fixed.

[His sweater is probably cashmere, let's be real here.]

I feel bad... you keep helping me for some reason. I could use the help, haha...

[A weak little laugh. A sad one, if anything. All he wanted to do was come to the cute little outdoor market! Why is this day going so poorly!

Ain... sits his ass on the sidewalk. Mopes. Now the rich boy is sad :(]

...alright. Thank you. I'm sorry for yelling at you so much, mister.

If you really wanna apologize, stop calling me mister. It's Wolfwood.

[Wolfwood mutters as he pulls open the driver's side door, careful of the broken glass as he sweeps enough of it off the seat so he can climb in and take a look. Let's see, now...what's the damage, did someone actually manage a hotwire here or did they just try to see what valuables they could steal from the console?]

...and I'm helping you because it's the right thing to do. Anyone else would.

[But using his name implies that they're friends :(

Ain has a strange way of thinking about the world.

Anyway, considering that to hotwire a car you need to knock out the bit that the key goes into? No, it hasn't been hotwired at all, and if it had a car this bougie would've been completely stolen and wrecked up the road. His glove box was raided, obviously, and so was the center console, but there's really nothing in here. The thieves left dissatisfied.

Good, the spiteful part of Ain thinks, fuck y'all.

He's gonna mope on the sidewalk with his chin on his knees like he's not 23 and wealthy until Wolfwood gives the okay.]

I know that much. I help people all the time... [Remember how he's a doctor? He is also a priest. And he will go out of his way to help the common folk.] ...you have a cross necklace, so you get it. It's Godly and just to help people in need.

...but I was being prickly because I was... am upset. I don't deserve it, but thank you anyway.

...come on, now.

[Wolfwood sighs once he's finished checking up on the car, leaning back against the seat.]

Is it Godly to look down on yourself like that? Just because you were being a little shit about it doesn't mean you don't deserve to be helped.

[Wolfwood you curse a lot for being a man of God.]

Your car's fine, by the way. ...I mean, it's not fine, but they didn't try to hotwire it. Just rifled through it to see if there was anything they could swipe.

Being humble is a lesson we're taught! I'm being humble!

[No, you're being mean to yourself.

Ain will continue to be a little shit at a later date. He's just like this. Changes his tune real quick afterwards, though. He used to be worse. He'd say stuff like "I guess you are useful after all!" but that was when he was eighteen and had the social graces of a fruit fly. And... In this case, it isn't about Wolfwood's use, but rather that he's being nice despite Ain's clippiness, and he really does appreciate that.

He's even learning to say it out loud! Wow.]

I don't store things in the car, haha. I'm glad it's mostly fine. I can get the window fixed, no problem.

[Mom's gonna ask about the car and he's gonna have to lie. That's fine. He's still her favourite right now.]

Alright, good.

[He says this as he climbs back out of the car, taking a moment to dust micro particles of glass off his slacks. God, he really needs a smoke after the day he's had...he was just meant to monitor the market as usual, not babysit a twink. But, honestly...he'd be lying if he said he entirely minded the change of pace, even if it meant Ain getting snippy with him multiple times about it. It proves to him, if nothing else, that Ain isn't going to let people just walk all over him even if he doesn't quite understand how he needs to be acting out here.

It's better than nothing. Nice to have a brain in that pretty head of his.]

And, just...do me a favor? Don't let this permanently taint your image of this part of town. Like. I ain't gonna stop you from going back to tell all your rich friends how ghetto it is out here, but...you really did just get unlucky today.

[There's a brain in his head! It's devoted to God—]

I already told you I don't have friends, haha. Clean the wool out of your ears for me, okay?

[Ain will get up, at least, and pretend he wasn't just pouting on the sidewalk on a side of town he's never been. It'll be a pain driving home with his window broken, considering the autumn chill, but it won't be the worst. It's not raining, at least. Just nippy.]

...but okay. Next time I think of this place, I'll think of the nice man who helped me, and not the thirteen rude people who robbed me. How does that sound?

[I already told you I don't have friends.

Next time I think of this place...]

Guess that means you ain't coming back, huh. Not...that I blame you or anything, but...

[Man. Why does he care? This guy...he's better off NOT here.

Right?]

Mister sure likes to make assumptions, huh?

[Ain turns to sit/lean on the hood of the car, putting his hands back on it. If he were a car guy, he'd not be doing this. He'd be like all the other hot rod drivers and getting pissed off when someone so much as scratches "his baby", but Ain is... not that attached to cars, to be honest, and if the city weren't so big he'd walk everywhere. He walks openly in his neck of the woods anyway, but going anywhere else requires a vehicle. Getting somewhere fast if there's an emergency requires a vehicle. He could use a cheaper one, definitely, but mom got him this one Christmas, and he's not about to just reject the gift of a fucking car just because it's "bougie". "No thanks mom I'd rather walk everywhere" sounds insane in a place where mafia violence is common enough that everyone has a home turf, and straying from it means getting shot.

Ain blends in without the mask. He's just your average, overly-religious rich boy.]

I didn't say I was never coming back. ...why? Is there something you like about this place that you want to show me?

Edited 2024-02-05 23:14 (UTC)

I mean...why the fuck would you? After the day you've had? I'd get it if you never set foot in this town again.

[But, like. He's still annoyed. This guy has caused so much trouble for him today. He's been! Reckless! And has no common sense! And he's had to save him like three separate times!! ...yet, he did apologize for being snappy about it, and he seems to have learned his lesson...sortof...

...

God damn it, though, he's cute. Why the fuck does he have to be CUTE. Here he was, having thought he got his boycrushes out of his system but no, he's still super fucking gay.

For some reason, the thought of just never seeing him again is an unpleasant one.]

There's just...good things about this place too. That's all.

It's very different from the north side. No offense, but no one dresses quite so... mm...

[Ain vaguely motions to a girl walking down the street in a flowy dress. It's not short, per se, just above the knee, but that may as well be short to the stuffy, wealthy Catholics up north.]

...we don't dress like that. Nor do people park their cars along the streets so often like this, and I feel as though we don't speak quite so crassly, either. There's less crime, too. I probably wouldn't come back, had I not met you, so there you go.

So. Tell me about the good things here, how about?

Yeah...I can imagine.

[Ain is from one of those kinds of areas, and those kinds of churches, he imagines. The really entrenched in tradition "you cannot show skin or you will go to hell" types. He does kindof wonder what it says about them that there's less crime in that area than this, but he's sure there is probably some kind of catch. No place is totally crime free, no matter how culty it is.

He doesn't miss what Ain says there, though. Had I not met you...]

...well. Have you ever been to a diner, before? Bet you don't have those.

[The catch is that any crime takes place very underground, very away from Ain, and very very away from Ishmael's watch. Ain... is none the wiser, because his worldview is so narrow, purposely kept narrow to avoid Corruption and Sin and all of that good stuff Ishmael hates. That's the catch.

Ain thinks his slice of the pie is so good.]

We have diners! But I bet they're different, haha. More high-end due to the economic divide? ...so I guess they're more like restaurants. I don't often get to go out to real diners, with all the jukeboxes and stuff. ...Why? Are you going to take me to one?

[Lord. Yet another drawback of Ain being rich and bougie, he doesn't realize when he's being...a little offensive, does he? Like yes, there's an economic divide, he's just lucky he gleefully pointed that out to Wolfwood and not somebody with a shorter fuse.

He falters, then, eyes widening a fraction.]

Uh. I mean... [Don't don't don't you said you'd stop making decisions with your dick don't do it-] ...if you wanted, I could show you. I'm usually in town, so...

[Buddy boy it's Ain. He doesn't know he's being rude ever in his life. He could be flat broke and he wouldn't realise he was being rude.

Anyway, Ain is also oblivious, so he doesn't realise this is a Not Heterosexual interaction for Wolfwood. This is how you make friends, isn't it? His mom will be upset if he makes friends with a south-sider, but... she doesn't have to know, does she? That's okay. He's just saving another sinner. She can't get mad at him for that.]

Yeah? That would be swell, haha. [i'm sorry chi 50s lingo is burned into my brain] When? I've kind of got this... car situation tonight, but there's no reason I can't drop it off at the shop and take a taxi back down here another time.

[Yeah, like. This is a date? This is a date. It could very well be platonic to take your bro to get food of course, but...this is a date. Wolfwood bites the inside of his lip, knowing he should just turn him down gently because...well, Ain deserves better than a guy like him, and also, he seems to not be super in touch with his sexuality just yet. He might not be out, for all he knows. It's the 50s-

But...is there anything wrong with just meeting up? Chapel would hate that he's fraternizing with someone from up North, but he doesn't come down this way, so he isn't going to know. Not unless someone snitches, but he doubts anyone would if they want their bones intact.

He glances off to the side, ears burning.]

Whenever you're free. Like I said, I'm in town a lot. I'll work around your schedule.

[Ain? In touch with his sexuality? Yeah he's straight. This man likes women. ...like he's never tried and he's never had feelings for anybody, let alone a girl, but that's fine that's okay. Surely he just needs to find the right one or something?

He's not thinking of any of that, or how fruity he looks on top of this car, or how this could be misconstrued as a date at all. It's not weird if two guys get dinner together! That's just camaraderie!]

Well, I sing in the church choir on Sundays, so tomorrow is a no-go. How about we meet by that park where the market is on Monday instead? I won't take my own car this time, but you'll keep me safe if we're walking around, right?

[ :) ]

[Bro you're assuming HE isn't also forced to go to church on Sunday. He, too, is a man of God, he just isn't all that good at it.]

Monday works.

[He shifts to one foot, looking back over at Ain with a lopsided smirk. It is the first time he's smiled since the two met.]

As long as you're with me? Ain't nobody gonna bother you. I can promise you that.

[What a nice smile... this guy should be a model or something. There's a lack of pretty male models out there.

...

Well anyway not gonna think too hard about that train of thought. Ain adjusts so that he's standing, no longer leaning on the hood of his car.]

Haha, alright~. Monday it is. Say... around four? [This is a date. This is a date, Ain, hello, wake up—] I'll see you then, mister. Don't forget!

[Yeah Ain maybe try to stop appearing so fruity if you don't want men to rizz you. Just a thought!

Wolfwood takes a step back onto the sidewalk so Ain has room to get into his car, watching and wondering if he'll keep his word and actually meet up like he says. After all, there's no way they could exchange numbers. The only number he has access to is the mansion's landline and uhhhhhhh no. No no. That's for the family's use only, and every call is monitored and tracked. He would have his ass beat.

This is fine, though. Better than he could have hoped for, especially since he didn't even think Ain would want to com eback here.]

I'll be there. Drive home safe.

[He's been eye-height with the titties this whole time, hard not to be passively fruity about that. Ain offers a smile, though, this one less fake than all his other ones that accompany his "teehees" and "hahas", and he proceeds to dust some stray glass off the seat — what Wolfwood didn't get earlier — before he gets in and sits down. He shuts the door, annnnnd of course they can still talk like this, he's missing a window, so he leans his head out of it as he futzs with the stick.]

You don't have to worry about me, haha. I'll be fine. You keep yourself safe here, okay~?

[And he pops his head back into the car and, whenever Wolfwood is out of the way, he'll drive off.

Okay. Time to tell mom a lot of lies.]

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